Joyful and Triumphant
by theglamourfades
Summary: Their greatest dream had come true once more, just in time. Spoilers for S5 CS.


**A/N: My first bit of fic written in 2015, and there was really only one thing I could do. This is my take on what happened post S5 CS and that beautiful, wonderful scene. Spoilers included, so if you haven't seen the CS yet, here's your warning to turn away or else be thoroughly spoilt.**

**As ever I don't own Downton Abbey, else Anna and John would have at least two babies by now.**

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><p><span><em>Joyful and Triumphant<em>

_It wasn't a dream._

She had thought his voice to be an echo in her head, the same as it had been for so many moments of the days that had been both occupied and deadly quiet. Her breath was stolen from her in the most pleasant way, her heart frantic in her chest. She clasped her hands to him immediately, the smile widening on her face as she gazed upon him in disbelief. His fingers brushed her cheek and neck, and Anna felt as though the world had shrunk only to encompass her husband's touch, which was no longer an illusion to her, happily.

The hall continued to sing with voices, unaware that they were disappearing, their palms kissing as eagerly as their lips wished to. The music of her heartbeat was all Anna could hear, pounding with ferocity as she let herself be led out.

She stilled them on their way, her hand slowly sliding up to his chest, eager to feel the rhythm of his own heart, while her other remained covered with his. Her question seemed meaningless against being able to reach out towards him. At this moment she was quite certain she would never let him go.

He hushed her gently and told her not to worry. She beamed a smile as she recognised a shift in the sands and found what she had believed in so implicitly to have become true. Her faith in him had guided her through the darkest times, barely just faded away, and she trusted that he would fight for her with all the strength that persisted between them.

No longer walking in a dream she walked at his side, her hands upon him as wondrous as the very first time they had sought one another's touch.

_It wasn't a dream._

God knows it had been the only thing he had dreamt of since he had gone, long before then in every hour he was waking or lost to fitful sleep. He had been saddened, his heart sinking to see her standing alone, separated from the celebration, but he was also glad that he was able to surprise her just as he had planned. He had contemplated calling ahead, so desperate was he to let her know that he was safe and on his way back to her. That she was where she belonged, free of trouble and surrounded by love, was the deepest comfort that brought breath to his body.

He knew that the sight of her would truly set his heart alight but he still found himself astounded and overwhelmed by the smile that lit her from the inside out. John was quite certain that he had never seen his wife appear so beautiful, and there were many occasions that could rival it. Every fibre in him sang a song he didn't believe he had ever heard or knew the words to. All because he was holding on to Anna once again.

He was unable to go a few steps without looking at her, the smile she wore and directed at him giving him undeniable power. She kept smiling up to him, the golden light emanating from the rooms they stood outside framing her face. He put his arms around her, guiding the way she had set upon as they met at last for a lingering kiss, both of their hearts in delight and at simple peace by the act no longer denied.

It was not enough to be touching her, suddenly. She needed to know the depth of how he had ached for her, how his life had been desolate without her. Putting his very soul into it, he braced his arms full around her slight frame, lifting her completely from the floor. John was beaming, tears coming fast to his eyes as he registered Anna hugging her arms around him, clinging onto him. He kept her held to him, turning slowly and rocking her as was his instinct whenever they embraced.

She had been his dream all of his life, and he was beyond all happiness to know that she was real to him once more.

Anna gave a breathless laugh as she was gradually lowered to the floor, her hand cupping John's cheek, still warm from where she had nuzzled her head against it. A tear escaped to trickle down her own; she was helpless to stop it.

"I thought I might never see you again," she whispered in a voice that she did not want to confess, not wishing to sour the mood.

"I'm here."

John smiled as Anna clamped upon his arm again, her head bobbing to affirm his words. His hands were planted upon her waist, the fingers of one stroking against the silk at her hipbone.

With no more words needed they kissed again, deeper and languid this time, the initial wave of relief that consumed them tempering upon the shore. John felt Anna trembling against his lips, murmuring her appreciation lightly. It only made him increase his efforts, caressing her back as her hands looped around his shoulders. Anyone may have stumbled out and unwittingly opened the door that kept them concealed, but they found it too difficult to care.

Anna broke first for breath, her eyelids fluttering open to find her husband's loving face still reliably in front of her own. She laid her palms upon him as their foreheads touched, her fingers dipping at the lapel of his jacket.

With a wide smile, John pulled lightly upon Anna's hand as he picked up his cane from where it was hanging upon the staircase. She followed him back on the way to the lower stairs, her light touch upon his arm and her questioning gaze chiding him softly for his reckless actions.

"This is for us," he uttered with the same steadiness he had displayed moments before, the same measured but deeply needing look set in his eyes.

Anna sucked in a breath and released it with the smile not leaving her face. Circling his hand with both of hers, she agreed silently.

Music and voices carried further away, singing the house's joy for them as they departed for their own home.

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><p>Bundling through the door and climbing quickly up the stairs, it was a necessity and not a mere need to remain close. Clothes were shed with fingers that were well equipped for the task, kisses in many forms pressed to skin as it became uncovered inch by inch. The dark became a shelter and not a guard keeping them apart.<p>

Anna clung onto John, seeking his gaze between their kisses. "It's not a dream, is it?"

He responded by offering her a securer touch, holding her hips while he stared into her eyes.

"It's not a dream, my love." He placed his lips at the spot just below her ear. "It's all real."

John's hands did not leave Anna for a second, caressing her tenderly and laying her down beneath him upon their bed. Neither thought about how long it had been since they had both been there together. Anna put her hands around John, her lips parting to let out a gasp at having him under her fingers once more. He didn't hide a smile at the exquisite sound. With a long kiss to precede their passion, bodies were brought together and played out in perfect harmony.

Limbs circled and still connected, both breathed in tandem, sharing quick and eager kisses to aid the recovery. John cupped the back of Anna's head, turning them and prolonging the press of his lips to hers as he slid from her, his hand lingering where he had brought her such exhilarating release only moments before.

Anna gazed at her husband as he lay back upon the pillow, her nerves still tingling at their edges. He returned her look reverently, his palm stroking the length of her arm over and again as she sighed, completely contented in every part of her soul.

"I don't know that I can believe it, still," she said in a soft hush, her eyes briefly flickering up towards the ceiling, finding the small and reliable crack running left from the centre.

John's hand cupped and covered her bare shoulder, warming her thoroughly. Leaning a little, he whispered into her ear, the single and simple word meaning all the world to her, transporting her to another time.

"Believe."

She kissed him full, the taste of him sweeter every time she encountered it. Anna's fingers raked through John's hair, the tips brushing at his temple every few seconds while he held the wrist of her other hand. Overwhelmed with love for him, she found that she could not hold back any longer.

"You were going to sacrifice yourself for my sake," she stated shakily, a hundred thoughts of the past months flooding her mind. "You already had, and if they had found you..."

"They wouldn't have," he stopped her before the sob choked in her throat. Looking at her, he found his heart's questions asked without a doubt: there always would have been a way back. "I couldn't have let that happen to you. It was unthinkable that I should have ever let them take you in the first place."

Anna shook her head weakly upon the pillow. "There was nothing you could have done."

Though the fact was true, it did not stop the agony that John felt at it. He wrapped his arm around her naked waist, pulling her closer to him again, the only cure for any of his ailments.

"You know, before it happened, when I thought they were after you," she shifted against him, her voice small yet growing stronger. "I would have done the same. I was ready and willing to."

She held herself away from him reluctantly to gauge his reaction, and saw his eyes in flame with the power of pain and love.

"I wouldn't have let you," he said, low and gruff.

Anna remained determined, her elbow burrowed into the pillow, her gaze momentarily lowered to where John's hand lay against her side. "So much more was at risk for you," she faltered for moments with the horror of it, before the words finally left her lips, "Your life, certainly."

"My life would be meaningless if I didn't have you," he confessed immediately, bringing forth a smile from her that was unmistakably tinged with sorrow. John felt the sting deeply, not meaning to hurt her by the implication, however true his words were.

A small smile came onto his face. "No more sacrifices. Not of this kind, anyway."

She was comforted by that, the sad smile replaced by sweet kisses that swept away any traces of anguish that were left to be felt. Anna lay back down, snuggling into John's side while he settled upon his back. Her breath huffed against him as they relaxed, her fingers dancing against his chest hair that poked above the quilts spread over them. How many winter nights had been spent exactly in this fashion, and Anna was so glad she would no longer be cold without her husband beside her, holding her tight. She'd never again complain about his snoring or how she might find him with a book in his hands in some godforsaken and far too early hour when she rolled onto her side, insomnia taking hold of him again.

A faint grumble came from John, unable to repress it as he made to move slightly, not only restricted by Anna's body beside his. His expression was tight when she raised herself to look at him, though he tried his best to smile for her.

"Just the same old injury," he replied to her concerned gaze, watching her as she sat up.

"Silly beggar," Anna laughed heartily, failing to remain stern for very long. "What on earth were you thinking, picking me up like that?"

"I was thinking how marvellous it was to have you in my arms again, and how I simply couldn't get enough of you."

The corners of his mouth quirked as Anna rolled her eyes lightly at his eloquent statements, and then John let out sighs in succession as her hands began to gently press at and massage his knee beneath the covers with practised movements. He surrendered himself to her touch, feeling completely at ease and so very enamoured with his wonderful, darling wife.

"Mr Bates," his name rolled from her tongue, a playful glint sparking in her eyes. "It's awfully rude to stare."

He couldn't help but let out a chuckle at her sheer impishness. She was over and above him, the sheets having fallen from her, her golden and slightly dishevelled hair flowing over one side of her body but leaving the other exposed. Of course her entire form was beautiful but John found himself riveted to the smile upon her face, just as he had been from the moment she had turned around towards him in the great hall.

His arm stretched before him, his palm reaching to cup her cheek. Her shoulders shuddered while she smiled more at his touch and John was quick to gather up the quilt about her while she remained sitting. Her fingers that had been working so diligently stilled upon him, leaving him burning now only in the most pleasant of manners.

"I can't understand it," he was about to hush her again, running his thumb over the curve of her cheek. "How it is possible I could go from being wretched to so full of joy in an instant."

She shrugged lightly and her body relaxed, pulling like a magnet towards his.

"I was singing, I could hear myself, but I wasn't there, not really," she went on, John's hand still held to her as he sat up in the bed too. "Everybody around was smiling, and they'd smile towards me too. And I really tried. I was just miles away, and I couldn't get back."

She smiled genuinely now, exhaling a sigh as his hand came to her waist.

"My heart was miles away, with you," the breath escaped her lips softly, her palm rested over the left side of his chest in the next second. Anna beamed as she registered the speed of his heart increasing at her touch.

"Oh, my darling." John lifted her hand to his lips, curling his fingers around her own and moving to kiss her shoulder. "And mine was with you. It always is."

He took her into his arms and they embraced, Anna laying her head against his shoulder. Their intimacy at that moment was unparalleled, and in the peaceful quiet it struck them both powerfully. There was nothing to separate them any longer and they took their time revelling in the feeling, entwined as they lay together with comfort surrounding them and their thoughts of nothing but each other.

John smiled at the feeling of Anna moulded against him, getting herself so close that she was almost a part of him. It was so very natural that as far as he was concerned it was as though those weeks without her at his side had never gone by.

"I should be the one taking care of you, my love," he said, his hand travelling lazily up and down her back, thinking a vague and passing thought about how he hoped he wouldn't burden her in the future if he became further impaired. It was a thought he didn't dare to voice any more, and anyway he knew spontaneous moments such as the one he had indulged in were worth it for all the joy they brought to them both.

Anna's voice was a murmur against the crook of his neck as she didn't move from where she was incredibly comfortable. "You always do. How could I ever say otherwise when you have taken care of me in the greatest way possible?"

Her honest words brought a lump rising to his throat; nothing else ever could have been possible. Her hands mapped a path upon his torso and stomach, and he covered one with his own, making her look towards him where they rested.

"I feel safe," she said simply, the words reaching straight to John's heart and making him feel more triumphant than he had ever been before.

"That's all I want," he replied, laying a kiss at her temple.

Anna crinkled her nose at the feel of his lips upon her, quieting a giggle in her chest. "And happy, too." She hugged her arm around his middle, sinking down further against him and onto the pillow. "I'm already so very happy, and it must only just be Christmas."

A quick glance to the clock upon the wall lit by a sliver of moonlight confirmed the fact, and John smiled before he turned over, earning a gasp of surprise from his wife.

"Well, Mrs Bates," he rasped as she gazed up at him in utter delight, stealing a quick kiss from her when her looks became too much, "it's my intention to make you even happier throughout this day, and for much longer afterwards."

Soon enough they were lost in laughter and kisses, losing themselves again to one another more than once before the sun rose on a crisp and bright Christmas morning, the finest there had been for some years.

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><p><strong>AN: Maybe the title is recognisable from a certain song that was playing while John made his return :')**


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